27 Funny Affirmations Sure to Brighten Any Day!

Funny Affirmations

If you’re wondering how to use affirmations, the first thing to know is that they don’t have to be serious!

Worried you’ll feel a little silly announcing “I am strong and powerful”, then why not opt for something sillier.

Read our list of funny affirmations that are bound to raise a smile:

Funny Daily Affirmations

Start your day with a powerful affirmation that doesn’t just uplift you, but makes you laugh, too.

9 Funny Daily Affirmations on Yellow Note Paper with Optical Illusion Background
9 Funny Daily Affirmations

1.I have to remind myself that I can’t make everyone happy. I’m not chocolate.

2.I don’t care if people laugh with me or at me. As long as someone is laughing.

3.I love myself, which is not surprising when you consider how amazing I am.

Be proud of loving the person you are with our affirmations for self-love.

Statements such as “I am a good person” and “I am worthy of love” can serve as a daily reminder.

4.I’m totally fine with being used as a bad example.

5.I radiate positivity (most of the time).

6.Please excuse me while I just go and be awesome today.

7.My friends are like my bras, they hold it all together.

8.Sometimes I have to tell myself, it’s just not worth the jail time.

9.I keep my chin up and my crown on.

10.I don’t make the same mistake twice. I make it at least ten times, just to be sure.

11.Hey Universe, send some awesome my way!

12.Feelings are just visitors. Kick the bad ones out.

Short Funny Affirmations

Mantras don’t need to be lengthy, funny short positive affirmations work as well as longer ones!

5 Short Funny Affirmations on Blue Note Paper with Optical Illusion Background
5 Short Funny Affirmations

1.Think like a proton. Always positive.

2.Even broken crayons still color.

3.Stressed spelled backwards is desserts.

Worried you’ll forget to recite your affirmation?

Research shows that humor can actually help to improve retention.[1]

It activates the brain’s dopamine reward system, stimulating your long-term memory.

4.Time to put on my positive pants.

5.If life give you melons you might be dyslexic.

Sarcastic Affirmations

Sarcasm was famously referred to as the “lowest form of wit”, however it has to be the funniest!

5 Sarcastic Affirmations on Textured Note Paper with Optical Illusion Background
5 Sarcastic Affirmations

1.Sarcasm is my brain’s natural defense against the less intelligent.

2.Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow as well.

Give yourself the kick up the butt you need with our motivational affirmations.

You can get into the headspace to smash your goals and succeed.

3.It’s ok if people don’t like me. Not everyone has good taste.

4.I love sarcasm. It’s like punching people in the face with words.

5.An apple a day keeps anyone away, if I throw it hard enough.

Funny Work Affirmations

Fulfill your career dreams with a fun work affirmation:

5 Funny Work Affirmations on Pink Note Paper with Optical Illusion Background
5 Funny Work Affirmations

1.I choose to be happy because it drives people crazy.

2.No alarm clock needed. My passion wakes me up. Oh, and coffee.

3.My keyboard must be broken. I keep hitting the escape key but I’m still at work.

4.Was it a bad day? Or was it a bad five minutes that I stewed over all day?

5.I always give 100% at Work: 10% Monday, 23% Tuesday, 40% Wednesday, 22% Thursday, and 5% Friday.

Maintaining your enthusiasm as the week progresses can be a challenge.

End the week on a high with a Friday affirmation for a peaceful start to the weekend.

Rise and Shine!

Get the day started with a morning affirmation.

It’ll quickly become a daily habit, helping you hone the positive mindset you’re hoping to achieve.

Laura Smith


Laura Smith

Associate Editorial Manager

Specialist health & wellbeing writer, passionate about discovering new technologies & sharing the latest research.


  1. Henderson, S. (2015). Laughter and Learning: Humor Boosts Retention [Online]. Edutopia. Available from: https://www.edutopia.org/blog/laughter-learning-humor-boosts-retention-sarah-henderson [Accessed 13 June 2023].